Bedtime routine/sleep training?

hi all, my 9 month old has yet to sleep thru the night. the most i've ever gotten out of him is 3-4 hours. we don't really have a set bedtime routine b/c his day schedule is not really set either so i've found it hard to say 8pm is bedtime (some days his last nap is at 3pm and some days its at 5pm). we generally have bath and then we can play a bit (nothing too crazy) and when he looks tired...i rock him to sleep and put him down. this is all pretty smooth, but he will wake/cry anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours later...i always rush in and check on him...usually i hold him again and rock and put him back down. he does this throughout the night and i go to him..i mainly rush to him b/c he just attacks his face w/ his hands. he rubs and rubs his eyes and nose!


any thoughts? step by step instructions would be great. overall he's a very healthy happy and active boy in the daytime. thank you!

Bedtime routine/sleep training?
Try and not let him nap after say 4PM, and try and lay him down at around 8-8:30. If he tries to nap after 4 keep him up. He might be cranky but after a few days he'll start taking naps around the same time in. His body will figure out based on when you stop letting him nap for the day and lay him down to bed about when (give or take 30-40 mins) he needs to nap during the day. He may be a bit cranky for a few days with his body getting used to it but for my daughter at least it made her a much happier baby. If you still choose to rock him to sleep the first time thats your business but the first time he wakes up go check on his needs hot/cold, new diaper, hungary. If he dosnt need or want any of these lay him bck down if you use a paci give it to him then leave the room. Check on him everyso often until he falls asleep. At first this could take 1-2 hours but every 10-15 minutes go in and comfort him, ect. If ater 1 hour hes crying again check diaper and try and feed. Then lay him down again. Also if he is hungary at any point during the night feed him but slowly start giving him less and less to eat. If he regularly drinks say 6 oz. whenever he eats at night, give him 6 next week 5 so on until you arent giving him any. At the same time try feeding him more foods during the day to get him to wake less at night.
Reply:I have noticed that many people have voted down anyone who answers that you should have the child sleep on his/her tummy because of the whole SIDS scare. Most babies sleep better on their tummys...plus it helps get the farts out better.





My son is 5 months old, but started sleeping through the night (7+ hours without interruption) at 4 months, and he began sleeping on his tummy at 1 month (in the "family bed").
Reply:put him to sleep on his tummy. He will be safe, at 9 months he can turn over anyway.
Reply:Start waking up at the same time every day. This will set a pattern and then the naps will start to fall into place. By 9 months you can probably move to one long nap after lunch. This will set the stage for bedtime happening around the same time every night. 8pm is a good bedtime. Do the night time routine so he knows it's bedtime.





Now comes the hard part. Stop rushing in every time he wakes up. He should be able to go back to sleep on his own. If he really cries, go in, lay him back down, maybe rub his back and when he calms down leave again. Don't pick him up unless he gets hysterical. Let him fuss for a few minutes before going in, he may surprise you and go back to sleep. Make the time you go back in if he doesn't go back to sleep longer each time by a couple minutes. It will take a few nights, maybe even a week or so but he will begin to realize that waking up at night isn't going to get him anything so he might as well sleep. It is hard to do, yes this is the cry it out method but with some patience and perseverance it will work. At 9 months he should be eating enough during the day that he doesn't need to eat at night. If he is hungry I am sure you know that cry so take him a bottle but feed him and put him right back down. No lights on, no music, no talking, no eye contact so that it's not a stimulating event.





The real trick here is to start establishing sleep/wake patterns that do happen at roughly the same time every day so he knows when it's nap time and when it's night time.
Reply:let him cry it out first of all and get him on a scedule if not you will hurt in the long run he know you will come get him when he cries so he does it crying will not hurt him it helps him if you keep running to him every time he cries then he will never sleep and you will go insane lay him down for a nap at the same time everyday he will fall asleep and bedtime everynight same time and let him cry
Reply:try and get him into a routine. ive had a routine with my daughter since she was about one month old and shes nearly sleeping through the night.





6.00pm bath time


6.30pm story


7.00pm put him down to sleep





if he cries when you put him in his cot, go to him, dont talk to him and dont make eye contact. i know its hard at first but you just have to persevere. good luck : )
Reply:"my 9 month old has yet to sleep thru the night"





That's normal.





See http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/... for some studies on how normal babies sleep...





"any thoughts? step by step instructions would be great."





"No doubt about it, the gap between what our culture teaches us to expect of the sleep patterns of a young child (read them a story, tuck them in, turn out the light, and not see them again for 8 hours) and the reality of how children actually sleep if healthy and normal, yawns widely.





But the first steps to dealing with the fact that your young child doesn't sleep through the night, or doesn't want to sleep without you is to realize that:





(1) Not sleeping through the night until they are 3 or 4 years of age is normal and healthy behavior for human infants.


(2) Your children are not being difficult or manipulative, they are being normal and healthy, and behaving in ways that are appropriate for our species.


Once you understand these simple truths, it becomes much easier to deal with parenting your child at night. Once you give up the idea that you must have 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night, and view these nighttime interactions with your child as precious and fleeting, you get used to them very quickly.





I highly recommend Dr. Sears' book on Nighttime Parenting [available from the La Leche League International Catalogue]. Our children's early years represent the most important and influential time of their lives. It passes all too quickly. But meeting your child's needs during these first few years will pay off in many ways in the years to come."





http://kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthroug...
Reply:I had the exact same problem. And I think the fact that you go to him everytime and pick him up at times, is good, because that's what I did since I figured that all she needed was to see me maybe for security purposes! She would wake up exactly 30min after she falls asleep. It drove me NUTS!! but she grew out of it, maybe now she knows if she calls, I'll be there.. so just sleeps. Give it another couple of mos. or so, he'll sleep too after the 30min benchmark!


and as far as 8pm bedtime is concerned, we didn't have one either. Rather it was anytime between 7 and 10pm! I strongly recommend that you follow his body's biological rhythm. Some kids settle into a routine a bit later. And frankly, I don't see a reason why he should cry his guts out, because bedtime is at 8!


I also rocked mine to sleep until 18mos, then I started a different routine by putting her in her crib, got her music on, and what do you know? she was almost expecting this!!


yours will be like that too, I suspect..
Reply:Routine, routine, routine! You need to have at least a semi routine for your child in order for him to know that he does need to go to bed and eat and get dressed, etc in order for anything to get better. Kids need routine in thier lives. If they don't have that, then they often feel insecure later in life and do not have the best skills in attention, manners, timing, and completing things. I promise you that if you set some sort of schedule for him, you will notice great improvements, not only in sleeping habits (which is VERY important to have routine sleeping habits in kids) but also in other aspects in your lives. It may be difficult at first, but before long, he will get better. Good luck and I hope that this helps you.
Reply:get into the same rutine every night and when he wakes up try to make him realize that it is wrong.


hope this helps


x
Reply:My son wakes right now cause he is teething..Working on tooth # 6 lol.....Just keep doing what your doing..I know its tiring but where does it say being a mom is easy...Good luck! my son likes sleeping on his belly but he is a roller and ends up every which way in is bed by the time morning gets around...
Reply:He's hungry.
Reply:well my 6 month old doesnt have a day routine but he has a night routine. try to get him to take 2 naps a day atleast. i start my sons bath at 8....then bottle...then bed...try to get him to asocciate bathtime with bedtime. first u need to set a bed time. figure out a time when he seems tierd everynight. then bath him around that time give him a bottle. then lay him down. i dont know if your aginst the cry it out method but it worked for me. he needs to learn to fall asleep on his own. when he wakes up 30 min -2 hours later its ok to let him cry for alittle bit. but if he doesnt stop crying then tend to him feed him if thats what he usually wakes up for, then lay him right back down..my son has slept through the night since he was 2 months..i used the cry it out method 1 time a thats what helped. good luck.
Reply:Well, it could be a phase. My son didn't sleep through the night until 8 months. Now at 10 months he regularly sleeps from 8 p.m. until 7 a.m. But this is not EVERY night! Like right now he is getting a stuffy nose so he was up a few times last night, crying. So I rock him back to sleep. I just figure if he needs me, he needs me, so I do it. He won't be little forever! But really try to get into a well established routine. Kids like to know what comes next. I just let my son establish his own routine and then kind of adapted my day around it. That became his schedule and he usually is within 30 minutes of it every day. There are some days when you are out or whatever and we get off but for the most part, we stick to it. Here is how our typical day goes: 7 am wake, play; 8 am breakfast, play; 10 am bottle, nap 12:30 pm wake, lunch, play; 3 pm bottle, nap; 5 pm wake, play 6:30 pm dinner; 7:30 bath, reading, bottle asleep between 8-8:30 pm. Hope this helps!